Relationship Myths and Questions

This whole dating, relationship, growing up thing is hard. I've come to realize that I'm always learning and that many people know a lot better than I do. One thing I'm struggling with right now is relationships. As most of you know, I ended my longest, most serious relationship earlier this summer. So now, here comes the tough part, dating. This is the first time I'm dating out of college now, since my last relationship was technically post-grad, but we had met in college, at a fraternity, and we partied like we were still in college. So I'm not counting it as a post-grad relationship.

On Feminism

Ever since I can remember, I've always identified as a feminist. Not until recently am I really delving deeper into the real meaning of what that means for me and others around me. If you haven't already read them, I was inspired by Nicole's post and Jord's post, numerous posts from Brita. I tend to stray away from posts that can be controversial, but I'm trying to throw that notion right out of the window. 

To bring it down to basics, feminism is the advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men.

In the past few years, I've been learning more about the nuances of feminism, equality, and misogyny, in turn I've also been in more situations where I can see misogyny and experience it for myself. I was raised in a middle-class family, as an only child. My parents raised me to be independent, not compare myself to others, and to fight for what I believe in. I went to a large,  urban, bipartisan school that was almost equally male and female. I joined a sorority, and even though many would think that being in a sorority would negate my feminist perspectives, it helped empower me to understand what a group of women can do together. Trust me, we all don't just have pillow fights, cry over who gets picked to go to who's fraternity date party, and paint coolers just so you can get lavaliered. Anyways, before I get stuck on sorority stereotypes and how many of them are wrong, let me get back on track. I never would have thought, in any setting, that I would find myself dating a male chauvinist. Here comes my one and only disclaimer for this post. I have never taken any women's studies, cultural study classes, etc. So I apologize if I'm not using the right terminology. I will try to explain the best I can, and if I'm incorrect I would love if you could let me know politely in the comments. For two years, I sat and listened to what I was supposed to do as a woman, what women aren't supposed to do, and why I'm doing good for a woman. Eek. I get that he wasn't trying to crush my spirit or be intentionally spiteful but why did I stand for that? As most of you regular readers know, I broke up with him a few months back, said my peace, and never looked back.